Dear Diary
by rhead-a-holyc
Summary: Peter's first two days at Hogwarts written as two diary entries.


_September 1st, 1971_

Dear Diary,

My mother told me I should write to you, since she cannot come with me to Hogwarts. She said that I needed someone to talk to because I find it difficult to talk to people.

Perhaps she's right, I don't know. Talking to people is the easy part, I think. Getting them to notice me is the difficult part. The talking comes after that, but of course I never manage to get anyone to notice me in the first place so naturally I don't have anyone to talk to. It almost feels like the natural way of life. The barrier is right there, but I don't know how to break it.

I'm not smart, or good looking, or anything special really. That's probably why no one notices me. It's just difficult to get good at something when you know there are so many people that are already far ahead of you, none of whom would have time to help you reach a level even close to them.

Anyway, the reason I wrote this isn't to rant. I'm at Hogwarts now. It's my first night.

I was Sorted into Gryffindor with a couple of other boys. The Sorting Hat was so certain about its choice to place me in the house of lions, but I'm not so certain. I guess only time will tell. Maybe things can be different.

Anyway, lessons start early tomorrow, so goodnight,

Peter.

* * *

><p><em>September 2nd, 1971<em>

Dear Diary,

It's my second night at Hogwarts. My mother had always said Hogwarts was a magical experience. She had constantly reminded me that Hogwarts would be like no other place I would ever experience. In a way she was right, the castle was every bit as enchanting as she had told me in her many stories.

She was also wrong though. The people were just the same. The Professors brushed over my name with barely a thought, and the students looked through me as if I didn't even exist. I wasn't important in their lives, so it didn't make a difference to them whether I was there or not. They were just like the people in the muggle primary school my father had insisted on sending me to before Hogwarts.

I don't know what I had been hoping, but I had hoped that there would be at least one person here that would bother to see me for me, not as some other person who didn't matter in the slightest. I wanted to matter to someone. I wanted friends like everyone else seemed to have enough of to take for granted.

I should stop there. Um, what else was am I supposed to say? Oh! Classes were okay. It was mostly theory but even that sounded a bit difficult when it was explained. The Gryffindors have quite a few classes with the Slytherins, which makes those classes a bit tense, but it doesn't affect me too much.

And there's this muggle girl, Lily something, who is simply amazing. She knows more than even the Ravenclaws. I would hazard a guess that she may even know more than some of the purebloods! It's amazing. All the professors noticed her, giving her smiles and house points every time she answered a question. I wish I was as smart as she was, but it was really difficult. That girl really is amazing for learning so much about things she had only recently been introduced to.

It makes me wonder if I could have done the same if I tried. It was too late now though. I would never be able to catch up to the knowledge everyone else seems to have.

What else? The house elves' cooking is wonderful! Breakfast, lunch, and dinner in the Great Hall really is spectacular. The grandness of the hall and the amazing food allowed me to forget about the fact that the conversation was flowing around me, and allowed me to imagine that I was part of it for just a little while. The feeling really is as amazing as I had always thought it to be.

I think, maybe, I'd like to try again. I want to continue to look for that one thing that I'm good at, and will get people to notice me. I don't want to give up the search. Maybe that's why I was Sorted into Gryffindor…

My eyes are starting to get heavy now, and my quill is starting to leave splotches of ink all over the page. It's time for me to sleep.

Peter.

**AN: Care of Magical Creature Assignment 7: Demiguise - Write about someone who feels invisible to others in some way**


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